Ask Deanna!
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Real People, Real Advice

Dear Francine:
If you’re the sole provider you make the laws, enforce the rules, and have ownership of everything including your sons’ behavior. They are being rude and disrespectful and your family is too. If your family is so supportive, ask them to let your boys get jiggy at their home and see their response. Stick to your guns, reinforce morals and values in your sons and keep it moving.

Dear Deanna!
I’m responding to Elise from Birmingham who had a fight because her girlfriend touched her husband. I agree with the fight because I’m married and my husband is my property. Her husband was wrong because he should’ve addressed the issue immediately and the fight would’ve been avoided. As a married woman, I would’ve responded the same way and her friend got what she deserved.
Rena
Omaha, NE

Dear Rena:
The golden rule of family and friends being off limits hasn’t changed. With the inflated men to women ratio married women aren’t punks and will protect their mates like lions.  One simply has to say it’s a beautiful thing unless you’re on the receiving end. A word to the wise, take heed because there’s nothing worse than a mad married woman coming at you like a bat out of you know where!

Dear Deanna!

The holidays are over and I no longer have a need for my boyfriend.  We dated during the summer but as the New Year rolled in I realized I don’t want to be with him.  The problem is the fact he gave me some expensive gifts that I don’t feel I should return.  He’s selfish and I know he’ll want

the gifts back if I dump him. How can I end this relationship but keep the gifts?
Tee
Oklahoma City, OK

Dear Tee:
You’re very rude and don’t have the right to discard this man like a dust cloth. You were with this man long enough to build respect even if the relationship needs to end. You need to close the relationship with decency and give him the courtesy of knowing why. If he wants the gifts back, you should return them to avoid conflict. Besides, there’s nothing too expensive that you can’t work hard and buy for yourself.

Dear Deanna!
I’m in a serious relationship with a prisoner. I visit him weekly and now he wants to get married. I love him and want to be with him but I’m scared. I’ve never been married and would prefer to wait for him when he gets out in seven years. He thinks we should marry now for benefits and income tax purposes but I don’t see it that way. I don’t want to lose him but I don’t want to marry him now just to keep him. What do I do?
Anonymous
Riverside, CA

Dear Anonymous:
You need your head examined if you don’t get it. He placed his desires for financial gain on the table in plain view. It would be more acceptable if he professed faith, love, and devotion but he didn’t. You need to wake up and see how crazy it is to worry about losing someone who can’t do anything for you but talk and write letters. If the love is so strong, he’ll wait for seven years because he’s not going anywhere no time soon.

Dear Deanna!
I love going to church but I’m losing my faith. Everything in my life is going wrong at the same time. I lost my job, my girlfriend, and my desire to enjoy life. I was drinking heavy for a while and my friends left me. Now that I’m down on my luck everyone has disappeared. How do I get myself together during a time like this because I’m really coming apart. Where do I start?
Neal
Memphis, TN

Dear Neal:
When the enemy attacks he seeks to kill and destroy. During periods of distress, lack of hope, and the good times, you need to pray and lean on your faith like there’s no tomorrow. This is a time of life, revelation, and cleansing so you can trust in God as He prepares you for a new season of blessings. At least you know who your friends are so that when you’re back on your feet you can leave them in the cold.

Editor’s note: Ask Deanna is written by Deanna M.  Write Ask Deanna! Email:  askdeanna1@yahoo.com or write:  Deanna M, 264 S. La Cienega, Suite 1283, Beverly Hills, CA 90211. Visit her web site at www.askdeanna.com.